Over the weekend I was tagged by Kateland of The Last Amazon to do the What's in Your Handbag? meme. Kateland must be crazy if she thinks I would have in my handbag the things a lady should have! But here goes.

Wallet with the usual crap - ID, cards, receipts, change, very little cash...

A letter I wrote to T on his 21st birthday, and never sent. I carry this letter (it is part of the Phantom Letters Collection that will be published posthumously) with me everywhere to remind me that my life is worth living. I wrote it in thanks for all he had done for me, and when things get tough, I take it out and re-read it.

Unpaid bills and final notices I don't want Mr. Right to see.

Condoms, on the off chance that I am presented with an opportunity to pay off some of those debts (call girls and Boy Scouts - always prepared for anything!).

A compact which contains two eye shadow combinations - one for day, one for night, and lipstick. I do not reapply makeup during the day, unless I have a hot date. I use the mirror after lunch to make sure I don't have food in my teeth.

A brush, given to me for the aforementioned hot dates, by a colleague who takes pity on my unmanageable hair.

Breath mints or gum (see earlier condom comment - just kidding!).

Cell phone. For arranging hot dates, and receiving calls from bill collectors.

The various passes I need to go to work - regular, evening/weekend security pass, and Metropass.

Keys.

Handgun (up to you to decide if I'm kidding).

MP3 player. Not an iPod, but my birthday is in 3 weeks... hint, hint. Batteries for MP3 player. Nothing a girl hates more than running out of battery power at a crucial moment (or a good song).

Currently reading Madame Bovary, and that's shoved in my bag, too.

Now, if you ever see me carrying a black leather briefcase, it contains the following:

Cat-o-nine-tails, riding crop, a collection of things that do and do not whirr, handcuffs, leather wrist cuffs with lock, dog collar and leash, chain belt, three types of corsets, lace skirt, optional garter attachments, red satin rope, and occasionally a pair of 4-inch heels.

Sorry Kateland, not very ladylike.

I will tag the Cotillion. I've always been curious about what they carry with them, other than their tiaras and flasks.