Tonight I did something I haven't done in 20 years. I had a Shirley Temple with dinner at the Italian restaurant up the street. I was actually embarrassed to order it, but I had such a retro craving, I had to have one. Twenty years!!

As I slurped the sugary goodness up the straw, I thought about sex. Well, actually, I thought about abstinence. If almost every teenage girl is a hoochie little slut these days (and that's certainly what the media makes them out to be), then it's the kids that abstain that are the rebels. And if city life is a giant cocktail party, like Sex in the City taught us, than the girl with the Shirley Temple is the pioneer.

Either I was having deep thoughts, or I was just trying to give myself an excuse for ordering a Shirley Temple.

Then Mr. Right put his hands to his mouth and did a duck call. In the middle of the restaurant. I told him he was lucky Dick Cheney wasn't around.